Unholy Smoke!
Duncan Jewett
Away With Words
Don't read this.
Acid Mothers Van Damme
The love of my life and me. Forever and always.
The love of my life and me. Forever and always.
I pee on my girlfriend. She loves it. She acts like she doesn’t love it. She does. She peed on me too.
So, let it be said that I hold almost no stock in things like this usually- for the vast majority of the most part.
However, for whatever reason, I found this to be relatively if not eerily correct?
Let it also be known that this information, in retrospect, isn’t something that I would necessarily divulge even to myself on any given day.
With all of that taken into account let us consider the results.
This is what your flirting style means for your dating life. For all of these responses, you are compared against other people your same age and sex. The flirting style with the highest score tells you the most about your dating life.
Physical
20-30%
Traditional
90-100%
Polite
90-100%
Sincere
20-30%
Playful
0-10%
Physical style: not very physical
You scored higher than 20–30% of other survey takers in your demographic.
You are not very comfortable and competent in expressing your sexual interest to potential partners. You are not very capable of figuring out that potential partners are interested in you, and not very effective at conveying romantic interest to potential partners. In your last serious relationship, it was not very likely that you:
- Felt attracted right away.
- Were successful when you flirted using your body language.
Traditional style: very traditional
You scored higher than 90–100% of other survey takers in your demographic.
You strongly believe that men should make the first move and women should not pursue men. You are very likely to feel uncomfortable in a flirting situation where a woman takes charge. You tend to be very choosey about who you flirt with, and it is very likely that you are selective about who you pursue romantic relationships with. In serious relationships, you strongly believe that you should know a potential relationship partner for a long time before approaching them. You are very likely to seek out important and meaningful romantic relationships.Polite style: very polite
You scored higher than 90–100% of other survey takers in your demographic.
You strongly believe that courtship should be cautious and rule-governed. You are very likely to use proper manners, non-sexual communication, and less forward behavior during courtship. You tend to be very choosey about who you flirt with, and it is very likely that you took a long time to get to know someone before you knew you were romantically interested in them. You are very unlikely to like the singles scene and the way people typically flirt with one another. You are very likely to seek out important and meaningful romantic relationships.Sincere style: not very sincere
You scored higher than 20–30% of other survey takers in your demographic.
You are not very interested in seeking emotional connection and showing sincere interest when flirting. You find flirting not very flattering, and do not really believe that personal and private conversation is the best way to develop romance. When flirting, it is not very likely that you are:In serious relationships, you are not very likely to experience a strong emotional connection and sexual chemistry.
- Successful
- Confident
- Able to quickly determine relationship potential
Playful style: not at all playful
You scored higher than 0–10% of other survey takers in your demographic.
You are very unlikely to use flirting to boost your self-esteem and to have a good time. You strongly believe that flirting should be reserved for the purpose of developing a relationship. You are very unlikely to flirt with those who you have no long-term romantic interest. You are very unlikely to find romantic interest in many other people, and to flirt everywhere you go. You do not believe that flirting is flattering and enjoyable. In your last serious relationship, you were very unlikely to have a short and unimportant relationship that moved quickly, but didn’t last.
Do you ever think about committing yourself to an institution? I think about it more and more frequently these days. over the past year or so there have been such strong and drastic changes within me that I feel like are outside of the realm of my control and I don’t think that’s a very ‘sane’ thought or whatever. I don’t really mean ‘sanity’ in a convention sense because, like everything else, that is a subjective term. I just mean that maybe it’d be better for everyone I know for me to be removed from them. I don’t think it has much to do with ‘me’ necessarily but more so what I feel or perceive to be a negative affect around the others I expose myself to. A lot of people would argue with that but it seems rational to me.
Meh.
Whatever.
Same difference, right? Between lost souls and lost soul-mates I mean.
Meh.
I like it.
What if your ‘love’ were like a spirit or something and it just possesses different people throughout your life? I can’t wait for mine to be born again. I have so much to tell her.
The best friend I’ve never met told me that today. He said that he’d been thinking about what that means.
I think if she moves through other people, those people don’t need to die or be born again. I think that maybe we force the spirit from one person to another, you know, like we suck the life out of each other’s spirits and then we wander around, trying to find our next one. It’s like each of us has a single other perfect, opposite ‘us’ that we are forever searching for and finding. We move between bodies but we’re always the same.
I’ll talk myself to sleep tonight. I’ll rock myself to free my fright. I’ll gamble because I always end up losing, no I’m not a safe bet if I’m betting. I creep, right? I seem tight. I see mics. I’ve never felt forever unless forever is tree bites. Tree marks. I scheme hearts. I plea bars. I’m a plea bargain. I may dream Martian. I’m here- you’re there- let’s just cream? I beg pardons. I beg forgiveness because I need to bare witness to the everything and nothing because nobody seems to get this.
I used to unconditionally hate favorites. When people said they had a favorite food or a favorite color or something like that. I thought it was the most trivial, meaningless nonsense anyone could believe in. I’m not sure what about my changed but I do have certain favorites now.
My favorite color is black.
My favorite mp3 player is my 4th generation iPod touch.
My favorite way to shoot video is with the aforementioned iPod touch.
My favorite style of dance is ‘jerking’.
My favorite symbol is the pentagram.
My favorite fictional entity is the devil.
My favorite Greek myth is that of Orpheus and Persephone.
My favorite time of day is night.
My favorite drink, excepting alcohol, is water.
My favorite alcohol is vodka, preferably vodka tonic.
My favorite place to be is in the water.
My favorite season is Fall. So much so that I used to muse with the idea of naming my daughter Autumn just so that I could call her fall.
My favorite style of shirt is henley.
My favorite number is 13.
My favorite word is love.
My favorite archetypal monster is the zombie.
My favorite holiday is Halloween.
My favorite two words, together as a phrase, are Glow Dark.
My favorite author is Haruki Murakami.
My favorite novel is Drood by Dan Simmons.
My favorite director is David Lynch.
My favorite artist/painter is Kevin Tong.
My favorite comedian is Brad Neely as heard in Wizard People, Dear Reader.
My favorite person, as of right now, is myself.
My favorite genre of film is Horror but I also love Science-Fiction and old ‘noir’ style films. I also really enjoy old noir books. I love Raymond Chandler but I’m more apt to read
I don’t have a favorite rapper. I don’t have a favorite musician, band, or single entity creating or recording music. That one is just too vast for me to be able to intelligibly articulate all of my thoughts and feelings of.
I don’t necessarily have a favorite food but if I had to pick something to eat everyday for the rest of my life, at least right now, it would be sushi.
My favorite form of micro-blogging is tumblr. Wordpess is cool but it’s also not really cool.
I haven’t found a font/typography type thing yet but I want one.
I best prefer horror created in the medium of film, I best prefer science-fiction created in the medium of literature- comics included.
I’ll get back to you with more favorites.
I’m pushing daisies hard enough that Gatsby’s rolling in his grave. I’m making babies, I’m dating ladies. I’m faking crazy. I’m taking lazy off my list and I’m creating paisley.
I’m looking hazy, art is tough and half-breeds’ bowling in this way.
— Duncan Jewett
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
I’m in love with a girl who seems halfway across this world and the ribbons through her hair will never tame those curls. I’m in love with a girl who walks so softly through this world, the quiet way of walking days without an inkling of before. I’m in love with a girl who deserves another world, one that won’t ever stop from becoming something more. I can now see her face and the changes taking place. She has risen from the earth to simply slow the figure eight.
I know that I am pretty, pretty ugly to you but I will not become what it is you want me to. The way that I talk makes my tear out my tooth but the way that you dance makes me never want to move. For fear of believing what I never thought true, that the body of the devil that I love is now inside of you. I’ve never known a body that’s as beautiful as yours and the broken bag of my own flesh is simply nothing more- than a mechanical contraption for which I don’t know. It’s purpose or presence within your heart of gold. I just want to find the wayward place that we call home, yes I just want to see us wrapped inside a thread of chrome.
I only speak in absolutes because I’m tempted by the truth that always haunt me. I will never let you go and if you need me, let me know. I’m always talking. If you would believe it, see you are forever needed by my side. The one I’ve always known to consider wayward home, I call you mine. I call you mine. I call you.
